I take a few days off, and I miss two great posts from Steve. They made me laugh as well as look at myself. Read them when you get the chance.
Also, Adam is back to blogging. Two great competitors in the ultra circuit.
Steve's last post "are ultrarunners crazy?" covers some great topics. He nailed down 4 types of ultrarunners. I think I have some of all 4 in me, but not to the extent I could be labeled as one. Other runners and friends would probably disagree with that statement though.
The topic does ask the million dollar question "why do we (I) run these races?" The full explanation will be on a different post, as I believe the answer is not simple.
The short answer;
I am probably dealing with unresolved issues from my youth. I look back at my youth and see myself as a quitter and a lazy person. I am not trying to be self loathing, I am just being honest. When I started running seriously again 7 years ago, I was doing it for me, not for what others wanted me to do or thought I could do.
I enjoy running, racing, and the friends I have made through all of it. I also like putting myself in situations which will truly challenge my mind and body. When I am scared of a race, I know I tapping the core of who I am.
I use this blog as a method to answer why I run these races. I don't think I will ever be able to clearly answer the question, though.
I am starting to get the blood flowing for next weekend. Surprisingly, I am not nervous because I know there is nothing I can do (other than preparation and rest) to make or break this race.
For me, the race (in my head and against my shadow) will start at the 100k mark.